Pack Rat’s favorite noise is snikkt!

In the words of the priest who blessed the cow pasture, HOLY SHIT. Have you people seen the trailer for the new X-Men movie, X-Men Origins: Wolverine? This is like if Awesome and Hot Damn got drunk and fooled around one night, woke up the next morning and promised that it wouldn’t change their friendship, only to find out Hot Damn was pregnant. Pregnant with this movie.

O.K. I admit a little bit of skepticism and perspective are in order here. As anyone who has ever picked up an X-Men comic book before the year 2000 will tell you, the X-Men trilogy of movies was God awful. Or, maybe not so much bad as sacrilegious. And I had such high hopes, too. After growing up with these characters, to finally see them on the big screen was so exciting…until I actually saw them on the big screen. And realized that what I was getting was the watered down, Reader’s Digest condensed version of forty years of story telling. Plus, Rogue sucked in the movies and if there’s one thing Rogue doesn’t do in the comics, it’s suck.

So realistically, since they managed to botch not one, but three movies about the X-Men, I probably shouldn’t get my hopes up about Wolverine. It’ll probably be too much action, not enough character development. They’ll probably miss-cast all of the characters in an effort to get “it,” name brand stars (although I have to say that I just about peed myself when I saw Tim Riggins from Friday Night Lights as Gambit). They’ll probably do a hack job editing Wolverine and Sabretooth’s back story (oh, I also almost soiled myself when I saw Ryan Reynolds was Dead Pool). And even though I love Hugh Jackman (plus, Hugh Jackman’s in this movie!!), I do have to admit that seeing him with steroid bulging, veiny muscles is kind of a turn off. If the past has dictated anything, then the odds are stacked squarely against this movie.

But have you see the part in the trailer when Wolverine is being chased by a Jeep and then all of a sudden the Jeep blows up, rolling ass over tea kettle, a huge gasoline plume of fire shooting out it’s ass, a helicopter hovering over head and all you see is this little dot flying through the air toward the helicopter? THAT DOT IS WOLVERINE!! The dot flying in the air and landing on the helicopter is freaking Wolverine. Sign me up. I am on board. May 1, 2009 son!